Checkmate

Several names will not be mention during this post, the place this catastrophe occurred or the names of people involved.

We decide with a couple of mates, to catch some lunch before our next lecture. So I order my food. Extra-large burgers, I up size my chips and one jumbo Fanta. Finish my food and I ‘am beyond full, my stomach bloated like a woman who is 9 months pregnant. We relax for like another few minutes due to the fact that, one of our mates hasn’t finished his meal, so actually I blame everything on him.

My stomach starts rumbling and nature calls, so I head to the restaurant toilets, all six toilets are occupied. I can’t hold it at this stage, I run outside to use the public toilets, out of the ten toilets only one is free, the one in the poorest condition. No time to be picky I enter lock it behind me and begin my mega business. Business is good today, after such an amazing adventure I’ am done. I reach for the toilet paper theirs nothing, I just start fiddling with the toilet roll. I remain calm and composed, whip out my phone scroll done the contact list to call a friend and that irritating voice explaining, you do not have enough airtime replies. I still remain calm theirs always BBM and whatsapp. I receive a message but decide to ignore it. Text my friend through my BBM and the red cross appears, so I try again the red cross still appears, I ping more than three times the bloody red cross strikes three times again.

So I go back to the main menu to read the message. The message informs me that my BIS (Blackberry Internet Services) has expired. Seriously what are the chances of that occurring? Alright now the composure has decreased. I start sweating a bit, you know when there’s a problem and you feel that one armpit sweat drop, drip down your side, yes that type of panic sweat. Now I’ am rushing to whatsapp my friend, because I’ am five minutes late for my lecture. During the attempt to use whatsapp, I delete it by accident. Partially my fault but give a man some space, like the bad luck is unbelievable, should have grown a goatee like thiago. Now there’s just no way out, so nasty methods start running marathons round my head. Some won’t be mention for the safety of people’s minds. I decide to go with my most logical plan, I was wearing some torn up batman inside shirt. Took it off and spent a couple of quality time minutes with it, before we both parted our ways in the most obscure way. As I was about to end my tough situation, some unfamiliar annoying bell started ringing. I started to rush up my situation, before I knew it the door automatically opened up slowly and revealed everything. Everything would have been absolutely okay if one or two people saw me. But the whole street stopped and decided to laugh at my pain. More than 50 people at least, to even top it off I’ am now 25 minutes late for my lecture.

Fml…